Friday, January 12, 2007

Shame, Shame

I got nothin' tonight. Back to the stats for some keyword search
frivolity. Ooh...some people are so naughty!

Shame, shame, ain't you glad nobody knows your name?
Take a gander at these beauties:

booger...c'mon, how old are you, eight? Are you doing a
science project and need to know what they're made of?
And why are you at MY MANSION?

smell my poopies...I smell a fetish.

does my wife need a good spanking...how did HH find this?

he pushed so hard it jams the pencil sharpener...better be
careful, you might hurt something in that pencil sharpener.

hillbilly in a bathtub graphic...highly inappropriate! And also
not easy to find.

addictions to halls mentholyptus...what are you, Mormon?
You must have blood as pure as Rocky Mountain springwater.

can a four year old take histinex...c'mon, you're not really
going to waste histinex on a four-year-old, are you?

i'd really like to see you tonight seal tab...that's actually not
a very good pick-up line.

cortisone cream on penis...and we need to know this why?
You know you're just jonesin' for some pics, right?

what's the effect on inhaling broken pyrex glass particles...
I'm thinking maybe...ohh...I don't know...DEATH?

tori spelling getting spanked...you dare to say what everybody
has been thinking all these years. But stop enjoying it so much.

no panties at dinner table...I agree. The dinner table should be
reserved for food and drink, not foundation garments. Gaahhh!

melina without panties...she's welcome at the dinner table
any time she drops in.

deers age from feet...you don't say? Then I suggest you stop
putting your stinky feet on the deer, because we don't need no
walker-pushin', oxygen-tank draggin', blue-haired, liver-spotted,
social-security-number-of-'one', feeble old deer mucking up
the countryside. Next thing you know, the woods will look
like a casino.

the flu lost my voice...oh, sure, go blaming the flu! I bet you
can never find anything! Grow up. Start taking care of your
stuff and putting your things away. The flu is not your personal
servant, you know.

soggy bottom boys beards for sale...just a gosh-darn minute.
How long were those beards? Cause I ain't buyin' no beard
that might have been sat on by a soggy bottom, boys.


There you have it. A peep into my secret stash. Don't worry.
There's plenty more where those came from.

6 comments:

Chickadee said...

Smell my poopies???? What is wrong with people? Gah.

LanternLight said...

Hey, you've just given me a topic to blog about :-)

And
i'd really like to see you tonight seal tab...that's actually not a very good pick-up line.

Unless you're an Eskimo...

Hillbilly Mom said...

Chick,
Get your handbasket ready.

Lantern,
I am quite inspirational. But not an Eskimo.

My uncle used to live in Alaska. When we visited, the first thing he told us was not to use the term "Eskimo". He said the people preferred to be called "Natives". The whole two weeks, I was afraid I was going to let the E-word slip.

LanternLight said...

But I wonder if the "Native" word is now offensive...

Redneck Diva said...

Wasn't it Kenny Loggins or James Taylor that sang "And I really love to see you toniiiight, seal tab"?

Hillbilly Mom said...

Lantern,
Who knows? Perhaps these days, they want to be called "Land-Bridge Crossers".

Diva,
It was England Dan and John Ford Coley. Not that I listened to them during their heyday or anything...