Monday, October 30, 2006

Hillbilly Mom Gets Shot

All right, I admit it. I only used that headline for sensationalism. Do
you know how hard it is to get people to come up in here and read
this stuff every day? There...whack my knuckles with a ruler. I won't
do that again...todaaaaayyyyy.

What I really meant to tell you was that I got a flu shot today. So
I did get shot...with a hypodermic needle full of dead influenza
virus. That's nothing to sneeze at, by cracky! I had the flu one
time, and I never ever want it again. I lost my voice for 3 days.
Do you know how hard it is to answer the phone with no voice?
People hang up on you! Even more than they do when I really
answer. It must be those people who don't want to play Trivia
with me, ya think?

Tomorrow is Halloween, so I am going to tell my ghostly encounter
stories to my classes. Then they will write plausible explanations
for the ghostly hijinks. We'll see how many doubters I have.

Today's writing prompt was: "I believe/don't believe in ghosts,
because..." One little fellow said that he did not believe in them,
because if they were real, somebody would have caught one by
now, and we would see them all the time, not just around Halloween.
Another one mystified me by declaring that he did not believe in
ghosts. Then he told the following story. "I never have believed in
ghosts. We moved into a house built in 1941. From the time we
moved in, I kept my closet door shut. One night, I stayed up late,
watching TV. All at once, my closet door flew open and hit the wall
so hard that the doorknob made a hole in the wall. Ghosts are not
real." Hmm...I think that would pretty much be all the evidence I
needed to convince me.

This is a busy week. First I got shot today (OK, I promise, I won't
say that again). Tomorrow, we have to pick up 3 packages at
the post office, get home, and eat supper in time for HH to take
the boys traipsing about town to beg for candy. One of the teachers
has a haunted house every year, so they are going there again. On
Wednesday, I really need to go to Wal*Mart for a new purse. I
need it for gambling. It is too hard to clean out the old one. And
I've had it for at least 8 years. The leather handles are all broken,
with stuffing poking out. I think I'm entitled. Thursday, the boys
have doctor appointments for Zyrtec refills, and possible flu shots.
Yep. I'm going to have my boys shot, too. (Heh heh. I didn't say
I got shot, now did I?) Friday, I will have to do the weekly
Wal*Mart shopping, because on Saturday, I am going
GAMBLING. It's an overnight trip, by cracky!. My aunt and I are
going to spend the night at Harrah's. I plan to have a most excellent
time. I may or may not cash in my $175 worth of winning scratch-off
tickets to take on the trip.

Wow! The school year is almost over, you know.

Oh, and if you want to read my haunted stories again, they are at:

Hillbilly Mom's Tales of the Supernatural
Haunted Bedroom
Haunted Basement?
Here's the bad light bulb (picture)
Mr. Chest O. Drawers (picture)
Smells, Sounds, and Night-Time Visitors
Haunted Gym?
Haunted Gym (picture)
Haunted Gym Haunts Others Too

5 comments:

Mommy Needs a Xanax said...

I got a flu shot one year, and that was the only year I ever got the flu. So after that I decided to let the old and the sickly have at 'em.

LanternLight said...

Do you know how hard it is to get people to come up in here and read this stuff every day?

I can imagine.

The great unwashed want to know, where did you get shot?

Arm? Leg? Booty?

Stewed Hamm said...

Flu shots are all a scam anyway. (The internet said so, so you know it's true.)

Redneck Diva said...

Mr. Diva got a flu shot one year and was sick all winter long. He totally blames the shot.

Kady gets one every year because of her asthma and this year the kids' PA is recommending that they all three get one, too. He said it wouldn't hurt for me to get one as well since I work with kids, but I'm going to take my chances. I have a pretty good immune system from all of my years in the snot industry. Continual exposure to snot and slobber will build up a gal's immunity like crazy.

Hillbilly Mom said...

Miss Ann,
What a freaky coincidence! It's kind of like how Lee Harvey Oswald might have been pardoned by the President, since there was that conspiracy talk and all...except that HE KILLED the President! OK, maybe it wasn't like that at all, but I like that reference.


Lantern,
I got shot in the left deltoid. For those of you who don't speak ex-PE teacher, that is the upper arm.

Now go take a bath, you unwashed masses! Next thing you know, the tired, the poor, and the wretched refuse of your teeming shore will be knocking on our border, saying they have a date with Lady Liberty.


Stewinginabigpotoinfluenzavirus,
You don't say? I must use it as a reference more often.


Diva,
My nurse/shooter of the flu shot also recommended that the kids get them this year.

You ain't got nothin' on me, gal. All my years in the public education cesspool have exposed me to more than I ever wanted. The first year of teaching, I was sick every two weeks. There must be many strains of the common cold virus. That reminds me...I must go check the internet for facts.