Friday, November 10, 2006

HM Plays 40 Questions

Here's a little thingy that's been making the rounds at school. What?
You think we spend all day teaching? Sometimes we find time for
that. Between thingies, and practical joking and snack-eating and
griping. We have our priorities in order.

Forty Questions

1. What is your occupation?
Purveyor of unwanted knowledge
2. What color are your socks right now?
Black. I am partial to 1950s pr0n style fashion.
3. What are you listening to right now?
Silence. Blessed silence.
4. Last thing that you ate?
Terrible Tater.
5. Can you drive a stick shift?
Oh, yeah...if it's big, like a jeep. Not so much if it's an itty bitty
Ford Escort, because I can't find the gears.
6. If you were a crayon, what color would you be?
7. Last person you spoke to on the phone?
Husband. Mine.
8. Do you like the person who sent this to you?
9. How old are you today?
To quote Brittany Murphy in Don't Say a Word: "I'll never tell."
And I'm singing it in that creepy voice, too.
10. Favorite drink:
Water and Sonic Cherry Diet Coke. Not mixed together.
11. What is your favorite sport to watch?
12. Have you ever dyed your hair?
Of course. Buy stock in L'Oreal. I even dyed it when I was
pregnant. What's the big deal about a little flipper arm, or three
eyes? At least I looked OH SO PRETTY while I was pregnant.
13. Favorite curse word?
M.....f......r !!!
14. Pets?
Dogs, cats
15. Favorite food?
16. What was the last movie you watched?
Thank You For Smoking
17. Favorite day of the year?
Christmas Eve
18. What do you do to vent anger?
Call people and throw things.
19. What was your favorite toy as a child?
My stable of Breyer model horses. I even sewed blankets for
them. Because the world is a cold and lonely place.
20. What is your favorite Fall or Spring?
21. Hugs or kisses?
Kisses. I've even been told I'm very good at them. Stop gagging.
A simple "That's too much information" would suffice.
22. Cherry or Blueberry?
Cherry. Who ever heard of a Blueberry Diet Coke?
23. Do you want your friends to email you back?
Yes, unless they are ragging about something.
24. Living arrangements?
Me, #2 son, #1 son, HH, and HH's CPAP machine, which
insists on blasting me with a cold air stream each night, making
me want to jerk a knot into HH's hose. The CPAP hose, too.
25. When was the last time you cried?
About 30 minutes ago. I told you the world is a cold and lonely
place. Pay attention!
26. What is on the floor of your closet?
Boxes of clothes that I plan to go through and take to Goodwill.
I've had that plan for about 8 years now.
27. Who's the friend you've had the longest that you're sending this to?
Bean. But I might not send this to anybody, so it's N/A.
28. What did you do last night?
A little blogging, a little TV, a little word search with my
befuddled son, fell asleep during the 2nd half of ER.
I love bowling night.
29. Favorite smells?
Christmas trees, rain, a freshly shampooed baby's head
30. What inspires you?
People who appreciate me
31. What are you afraid of?
Heights, deep water, 6 lanes of traffic, seeing headless men
in my basement
32. Country you would most like to visit?
33. Favorite dog breed?
34. Number of keys on your key ring?
5 home, 5 school
35. How many years at your current job?
36. How many states have you lived in?
37. Favorite holidays:
Christmas and Thanksgiving
38. Ever driven a Motorcycle or heavy machinery?
I think not
39. What's your favorite saying?
People piss me off!
40. Where did you get the chair you're sitting on right now?
Christmas gift from HH, who got it at Office Max


LanternLight said...

1. :-(
2. Aren't we all :-)
3. I wish
5. When I test-drove a Jeep, I thought it was the most agriculture thing this side of a Harley Davison. All that was missing was the wheat straw hanging out my mouth.
19. Did you have a Barbie collection as well?
38. Hey! Sounds like your driven a Jeep.

Why yes, perhaps I do have too much time on my hands this morning.

Hillbilly Mom said...

You must really be a city-slicker kind of fella, if driving a Jeep was agricultural for you. Around these parts, 'heavy machinery' means a backhoe, or an eighteen-wheeler, or an earth-mover. The Jeep I drove was a Jeep CJ7, which was just a regular everyday automobile with a long wheelbase, not as easy to tip over as the Jeep CJ5. It was sky-blue, with a 3-speed transmission. I could even stop and start on an incline.

I had a Barbie, but I don't think I had the Ken for her to shag, or the Skipper for her to go incestually gay with. The best thing about the Barbie was the clothes. At Christmas, my aunt would give my sister and I each a big box of Barbie clothes. They were handmade, too, not the kind from a plastic-on-cardboard store display. I don't know if she made them herself, or bought them from someone, but that gift ROCKED!

LanternLight said...


You must really be a city-slicker kind of fella, if driving a Jeep was agricultural for you.

No, I grew up in the country. I've driven the 2 door Jeep Wrangler. It was agricultural! It would be a whole lot of fun in the dirt, but on the asphalt it drove like the tractor it is. "Where's my kidney belt", I asked myself.

The clutch on the CJ7 must have been a b*tch.

Hillbilly Mom said...

The clutch did not bother me so much as the emergency brake, which I was continually forgetting to release after trips to the local Brown Derby liquor chain. Did you know that a Jeep CJ7 will drive just fine in reverse while the e-break is on? But if you try to go forward, you look like a teenage girl learning to drive a standard shift. One of my cronies had to tell me "Why don't you just release the emergency brake?" Duh! And that was before we even opened our purchases for the evening.