Thursday, November 23, 2006

Happy Thanksgiving From The Mansion

We had a plethora of turkeys for Thanksgiving Day. Let's start with
the newest addition, pictured above. That's my #1 son, pleased as
punch with the turkey he shot with his bow. The toy bow in the picture.
That's his story, and he's stickin' to it. But the scoop according to
#2 son is that the Veteran hit it with his truck on the way to the
Mansion this morning to (you guessed it) turkey hunt down in the
woods with his compound bow.

#1 is going to take the picture to school and tell a big long hunting
story. I'm sure it will endear him to his cronies. The guys plucked
that sucker, and he is wrapped up in the freezer in the barn to be
deep-fried later this weekend. Please excuse me for getting the boy
that "Bow-Tie Killer" haircut, like in the movie Problem Child. If
his hair gets too long, it is wavy and unmanageable, and looks like
Jimmy Neutron hair. Which he likes, I might add.

The Veteran and I told the boy he should make a necklace of the
turkey feet and wear it to school. He could absentmindedly scratch
his face with a toe, or pick his teeth with a toenail, and say, "What?
This old thing? It's just the foot off the turkey I shot Thanksgiving

The Veteran is not so pleased with his kill, as it destroyed
the grille of his truck, the truck he just bought upon his return from
Iraq. He called the local police to report the murder, who told him
to call the Conservation Dept. They were supposed to call him back,
but had not by 3:00. At least there is a record that he tried to report
it, just in case the people behind him when all the turkey feathers
blew out of his pick-up bed reported him as a poacher.

The second turkey was won by HH in a radio contest last week.
He was on the way to work around 6:15, and called in to be caller
number 11 and win a chance at a turkey. He called, and was number
5. Being HH, he tried, tried again, and was number 11. Not many
people listen to that local country station, it appears. HH had to guess
how many shots it would take to kill the turkey. He guessed '3', and
that was it. On Tuesday, he drove to the radio station to claim his
turkey certificate, and then had to drive back to our town to claim
his bird. He walked up to what looked like a house, with men gutting
a pile of about 15 deer stacked in the yard. "Is this where I come to
get my free turkey?" "Yep," they said, and one walked around back
and returned with a turkey. It was frozen and wrapped, so I suppose
it's OK. It was a commercial store-bought-looking bird. It's also in
the freezer.

The third turkey was eaten at my Hillbilly Mama's house today. There
are still leftovers for tomorrow. Along with the other goodies, we
enjoyed a baby-food jar of butter, homemade by #2 son at school
on Tuesday. It was delicious, though the boy was a bit peeved that
we ate all of it. According to him, they made it by putting cream and
salt into the baby-food jar, and shaking it for a good long time until
butter formed. He said a couple of kids broke their jars. His teacher
is way braver than I am to attempt to teach 20 third graders to make

I believe this will go down as one of our more memorable Thanksgiving
celebrations. We are most thankful to have the Veteran home, safe and
sound. He has signed on for another 5 years, and plans to make a
career of the military.


LanternLight said...

He has signed on for another 5 years, and plans to make a
career of the military.

Since he's re-up'd, does that mean he gets to stay Stateside, and avoid another tour?

"We sleep safely in our beds because rough men stand ready in the night to visit violence upon those who would do us harm."

Hillbilly Mom said...

He says he can't be sent anywhere for 2 years. He signed a two-year contract to train recruits at Fort Leonard Wood, which is less than 3 hours from here. Another unit had already requested him to go to Iraq with them when they were deployed, because of his experience. A commanding officer recommended him for this training position. He says it's the only positive thing the guy has ever done for him, but it came at just the right time.

We felt very safe with him at Thanksgiving dinner yesterday. There was a wasp buzzing around the window, and he jumped up, grabbed his cap, whacked it, then stomped it. Didn't matter that he is allergic to them. Seems that maybe those propaganda commercials about the military making a man of a recruit have some truth behind them. Who knew?